Wake Me When September Ends

There’s a fantastically melodramatic song by Green Day that captures exactly how I feel about the month of September. It’s been a good month to numbly avoid for years, as far as I’m concerned. Anniversaries of scars are scattered throughout from the first through the 30th there has been little reason for smiling, for much more than a few decades now.

Until this year!

There was a glorious reason for celebration this September first, and I am pleased as punch to announce that I am an Aunt again!

Babies make the world a better place…no matter how scary it actually is, a baby’s scent sweetens the sourness of reality long enough to continue pursuing the plan.

The world is literally burning and drowning simultaneously and all I want to do is think about the new life learning to love for the first time.

…I can’t of course, regardless of the cocktail of medications I have finally committed to taking.

September is still challenging. The lover of alliteration wants to say, September still sucks, but that sounds super negative. We all have weak days, today just happens to be one of mine! 

I guess I should be grateful that I get all my worst memories over with in one month…

The blessed rains began again in the Pacific Northwest yesterday, cleansing the air of the fires raging all around us...perhaps that’s what my soul needs, a good cry to cleanse my emotions. My fear of course, once I start I won't be able to stop. Hurricane Irma and I have much in common emotionally!

Tomorrow is a big anniversary, one we all share. Having been under the towers that terrible Tuesday 16 years ago is my one socially acceptable scar, the one that I can share without traumatizing the person with whom I am speaking. I have avoided as much of the world as I could each anniversary of the terrorist’s attack, until this one. Maybe it’s the earlier mentioned medications, or perhaps it is finally time to get over it.

Oh how I hate that statement, like there is choice involved…I wouldn’t choose to hold on, how can I choose to let go???

But let go I must. Let go I will! …eventually. Maybe when September ends.